When sleeping with your wife, it is imperative to maintain certain
societal standards. The same rules apply when sleeping with
the wife of a fellow gentleman.
1
By keeping your eyes open at social functions and reputable
soirees, locate the married woman you most desire to sleep
with in a secretive manner.
2
Introduce yourself to the woman and let it be known
through heavy flirtation, arm touching, and eyebrow
raising that you are interested in the ultimate transgression.
3
Send the woman a formal request to engage in an affair
via handwritten letter, candy gram, or tasteful dick pic.
4
Have your secretary inform the woman’s gentleman-husband
that you are sleeping with his wife and request that he not be
present for the intercourse.
5
If he inquires about the availability of your own wife, let him
know if she is currently seeing any other gentlemen, and
if she has an adequate schedule to participate in an affair
of her own.
6
Meet the woman and her servant at a prearranged location,
often a hotel.
7
Have your servants undress you in front of each other, placing
your clothes neatly on the hotel bed. Take a moment to stare
at each other’s naked bodies, taking in the sight of the
forbidden flesh.
8
Consume an alcoholic beverage, so as to either lessen or
heighten any remaining feelings of guilt.
9
Using an abrasive pumice stone, have your servants vigorously
scrub you and the woman’s skin, ensuring any and all lingering
skin flakes of married partners has been removed.
10
Inform servants they may retire to the hotel bathroom until
you have completed your act of indiscretion.
11
Stand atop the bed. Hold each other’s hands and say,
“We shall now engage in a sexual act of indecency.
May our bodies be free and our hearts intoxicated
in the spirit of betrayal.”
12
Screw like vodka-addled rabbits.
13
Smoke a cigarette. Call your wife and ask her if she needs
anything from the grocery store. She will understand
this to mean you have just ejaculated into the vagina
of another woman, and she should not expect sexual
intercourse for the next ten hours.
14
Instruct your servant to call the front desk and have
the maids informed that sexual fluids have been
released upon the mattress.
15
If you wish to continue the affair, have your secretary
let the woman know in a detailed sexual message,
highlighting future acts you would enjoy completing
with her as well as emphasizing how much you
enjoyed her company.
16
Return to work and remind your servant that if he or
she says anything they are fired and you will ruin them.
No comments:
Post a Comment